Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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