I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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