I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
