woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize