i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Sober January is a disaster.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
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