She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
