I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
