so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize
