Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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