Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
