think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
