am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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