Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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