im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
