you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Randomize
