I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
