He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
