You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
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