I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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