do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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