NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
