Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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