just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
is that a dick in a sweater?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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