Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
