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Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
