that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
