I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
