i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
