well most of my day revolves around power hour
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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