I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
