iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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