dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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