He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
