Got a toothbrush?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
