They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
