On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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