I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
