the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
