I think i sorta joined a cult last night
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize
