Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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