its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
