I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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