I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
