Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Randomize
