so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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