How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
