Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
