yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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