Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
