She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
